Thursday, January 31, 2008

Bathroom Confessions

I was preparing for the worst when Devon walked over to our table. I knew that he wasn't Sean's biggest fan and I thought for sure that seeing me with him would set him off on some kind of anger induced rage.

When Devon came to our table, he greeted Sean politely and asked how he was doing. "How is the job going? Keeping busy?"

"I have no complaints," Sean replied.

"Good, good," he was talking to Sean but he was looking at me. "Hello Janie," he flashed me that 'oh so sexy, heart melting' smile of his as he slowly squat down next to my chair. With one hand resting on the back of my chair, he told me that he called my office just before he came out for lunch. "I was wondering if you got my message."

"Your message?" I frowned. "I haven't called the office Devon."

"No," he chuckled, "my text message? My response to your message earlier."

"Oh," I shook my head. "No, I didn't what did it say?" I asked as I reached for my purse to pull out my cell. I had texted him earlier to see if he was going to call me that night like he had for the last few nights; we hadn't had many opportunities to spend anytime together lately. In fact, this was the first time I've seen him face to face in a while. I missed him so much.

As I flipped my phone open and pressed 'ok' to see his message, he told me that he wasn't able to make the call tonight. My heart dropped. "Read the message," he patted my leg. "I look forward to getting your response."

Without saying another word about the text, he stood up and told us to enjoy our meal. I watched him walk over to his table, totally hurt that I wouldn't be hearing from him that night and upset that he didn't even tell me why.

"Why don't you put your phone away?" Sean reached across the table in an attempt to remove my phone from my hand.

"Hey!" I pulled it out of his reach at the last second, "I'll put it away when I'm done," I told him. My eyes slid downwards until they were staring straight at the tiny screen and the words Devon sent me over an hour earlier, "Tonight I would like to do something a little different Janie. Will 6 be too early to pick you up?"

I couldn't help the grin that spread across my face as I lifted my head to look towards Devon's table; he was deep in conversation with his lunch partner, he didn't see me look over at him. Turning back to my phone, I pressed a few buttons, typing out "6 sounds good to me. Should I wear anything special?"

A few seconds after I sent the message, my phone beeped to let me know I had a new text - "Just the smile you have on your face now."

I was just about to hit the 'reply' when Sean asked me if I was going to spend all of lunch on my phone with Devon. "If I was an insecure guy Janie, you would be crushing my ego right now."

"For some reason I don't think it would have any effect on you Sean."

"No?" He raised a brow. "You don't think that it's bruising to the ego to be ignored while out to lunch with a beautiful woman?"

"I'm not ignoring you."

"Oh I think you are, at least since Devon waltzed over here."

"Well it's not like I wanted to do lunch with you." The second those words left my lips, I wished that I could take them back.

"Of course not," Sean agreed. "You'd rather spend your day texting back and forth with Devon."

"Why are you being like this?"

"Oh I don't know," he shrugged. "I guess it's the first time I've been told I wasn't good enough because I don't swim in pools of money."

"What?" I stared, open mouthed at him. "How dare you say that? You don't know a damn thing about me if you think your wallet would be all of interest to me!" I tossed my napkin on the table and pushed out my chair. "And for your information Sean, you are a 'Johnson', that name screams money in this town!"

I had to get away from him before I left my hand print on his cheek. I stood up, grabbed my purse and stomped off towards the back of the restaurant where the bathrooms were located.

For a couple minutes, I paced the floor, trying to calm down enough to go out and finish my lunch without killing Sean for suggesting I was a gold digging whore. How dare he? He didn't know me! If I was a gold digger, then what the hell was I doing with Cary? He didn't have any money and I still loved being with him.

"I'm not a gold digger," I snapped at my reflection. "I can't help it that Devon comes from money, that's not why I like him."

Ring. Ring.

"Speak of the devil," I muttered before answering my cell. "What's up Devon?" I tried not to sound upset but it didn't work.

"What happened?" He asked me. "I looked over, you were gone and Sean had this stupid look on his face. I recognized the look; it's one I've had numerous times when I upset you." He chuckled softly and then asked what Sean did to piss me off.

"Oh nothing," I replied nonchalantly. "I just love it when people tell me I'm a gold digger. Makes me very happy."

"What?" Devon laughed. "You? A gold digger? Baby if that were true, why aren't you in my arms right now? I'll let you have all my money in exchange."

"I'm not a gold digger Devon!"

"Janie I know that, everyone who knows you knows that. Why does Sean think you are?"

I leaned back against the sink and sighed. "I think he's interested in me and believes that the only reason I won't go out with him is because he doesn't 'swim in pools of money'."

"Oh," Devon's tone changed. "You told him that wasn't why you wouldn't go out with him?"

"I shouldn't have to give him a reason Devon! If I don't to go out with him, I shouldn't have to justify why. I don't care what Lenore says or does, it's just not going to happen."

"Whoa, hold on a minute. Lenore? How does she enter into this?" I told him I didn't want to get into it but he insisted that I tell him. "You can't just say something like that and not expand on it Janie. What does Lenore have to do with any of this?"

"Nothing," I told him. "She just thought it would be nice if I asked Sean out."

"Uh huh," he didn't sound like he was convinced. "I'm sure she said more than that Janie; just tell me what it was."

"Fine," I sighed. "She doesn't think that I should date you because I've given you many chances and you ended up breaking my heart every single time. I told her that wasn't true and it didn't matter because I believe you have changed a lot in the last couple months; there are things you say and do now that you wouldn't even think of doing before. I told her I wasn't interested in seeing anyone else but she seems to think that I should date other guys, namely Sean."

I waited but there was nothing but the sound of his breathing on the other end of the line. Fumbling with the cold water tap, I said his name. "Please say something," I begged.

"Maybe she's right Janie," he said finally.

"No!" I cried. "She's not right Devon! I don't want to-"

"Janie, Lenore is right; I have hurt you over and over again. Maybe I won't this time, I don't want too, but maybe I really haven't changed that much."

"Devon don't say that, you have changed, you aren't the same man you were when we were together before."

"What if I am Janie?"

"No," I shook my head. "You aren't, I know you aren't. The man you were before wouldn't have let me stay with him and not expect me to put out. The man you were before wouldn't have taken the high road every single time another man challenged your role in my life. The man -"

"Janie I'm still the same Devon I've always been."

"No, you aren't."

"How can you be sure Janie?"

I lowered my head to gather the courage to say what my heart had been screaming for months now. Taking a deep breath, I lifted my head confidently and spoke clearing into the phone, "I didn't love that man as much as I love you right now."

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Caught You

I planned on telling Lenore that I didn't call Sean but I waited too long. I didn't even know it was too long until noon last Thursday when I looked up from the memo I was reading to see Sean making his way across the floor towards me.

"Who is that?" I heard the office whore, Jill, whisper from the doorway to the coffee room. I could picture her adjusting her cleavage like she did every single time there was a good looking man in the room.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Jill heading towards Sean as he reached my desk. With a flip of her platinum blond hair, she flashed him a smile and held out her hand to him. "Hello, I'm Jill, how can I help you?"

"Actually," he sat on the corner of my desk, crossing his arms as he looked down at Jill. "I'm here to see Janie," he leaned in and whispered, "She's all the help I need."

Jill raised a brow in shock. She went to say something but Sean was already turning around to face me. "Good afternoon Sunshine, can I take you to lunch?"

"Well I sorta..." I motioned towards my desk, as if I had lots of work to do still.

"Unbelievable!" Jill scoffed.

"Janie did I tell you I had an interesting conversation with Lenore this morning?" He paused, glanced at Jill and then back at me. "Do you know what she had to tell me?"

My eyes widen, "She didn't!"

He nodded slowly, "She did."

Crap! "She didn't know what she was saying."

"Really?" He raised a brow, "She seemed pretty sure that -"

"Sean!" I jumped out of my chair, cutting him off before he could spill anything to Jill. I didn't need her to know any of my business - she tried to get with Devon when we were dating before, I didn't want that to happen again - he is mine.

I guess it's needless to say that I ended up going out for lunch at Ember Cafe, the same place we went the night I injured my ankle. Like that night, I really didn't want to be there with him but he seemed to be oblivious.

"I have to ask," he said once the waitress brought us our lunch and refilled our glasses. "Why did you tell Lenore that you called me? How did I come up in conversation between the two of you where she would think you'd want my number?"

I thought for a while - thought about telling him some bullshit lie but suddenly my mom came to mind and I started to think about how little time I could have - I didn't want any more bullshit than I really needed. Honesty was something I decided that I was going to try out for a while. See how it fit.

"Lenore thinks that you are interested in me," I told him point blank and I swear his jaw dropped to the table top. "She doesn't think that Devon is good enough for me and wants me to ask you out."

When Sean didn't react right away, I didn't know what to think so I continued. "I told her I wasn't going to ask you out but she insisted that I take your number and call you anyway." I sighed, "She kept bugging me so I told her I called you."

Silence settled over our table. I felt a little uncomfortable, I wanted him to say something - anything, I didn't care. Finally, after a couple rapid blinks, he cleared his throat. "Wh -" he frowned and reached for his glass of water, almost knocking it over in his haste. I waited for him to take a drink and then asked him what he was going to say.

"Wh - wh - " he coughed and then started again, looking a little confused. "Why does Lenore think I'm interested in you?"

I started to reply right away but slowly trailed off as his question sank in. "Wait a minute?" I leaned in over the table. "You aren't interested in me?" He didn't have time to reply for I shot off a series of questions. "What's with all the flirting then? The attitude towards Devon? The nicknames, what are those all about? And what about Christmas Day when you said you told Reed you were waiting for me? What was all that about Sean?"

"You know Janie," he grinned as he leaned back in his chair. "For someone who claims not to be interested in me, you seem a little too ticked the possibility that I'm not interested. Are you sure you are in Devon as much as you say you are?"

"Whatever!" I rolled my eyes. "I don't care if you are interested or not Sean."

"Uh huh," he chuckled. "Whatever you say Sunshine."

I turned my attention back to my food, ignoring him.

"Oh come on Janie," Sean reached his hand out towards mine and I pulled it away. "What do you want me to do?" He asked. "Tell you that you get to me?" My head shot up. "Is that what you want Janie? To know that you are always on my mind? Do you want to know how much I wanted to kiss you the night you hurt your ankle?"

I looked down at my plate.

"You were there Janie, you know how close I was to doing just that."

"Why didn't you?" I found myself asking.

"Look at me Janie."

Slowly, I tilted my head upwards until my eyes locked with his. "I wanted too," he admitted.

"But you didn't," I said unnecessarily. "You walked away from me that night."

"Yeah," he nodded slowly. "I did. I was staring down at you, you seemed like you wanted me to kiss you but there was something holding you back...Devon."

"What? Why do you think -"

"No, Janie," Sean motioned behind me. "Devon."

I quickly turned around, just in time to see Devon's smile, the one his lips turned up in when he spotted me, turn into a cold stare as he realized that I wasn't alone. I watched him lean in to say something to the guy he was with, the guy nodded and went with the waitress; Devon straightened his tie and started towards us.

Monday, January 21, 2008

To Tell The Truth?

"Lenore," I smiled sweetly at her. "While I appreciate your concern and I value your opinion, I know what I feel," I pressed my hand against my chest. "In here."

Lenore perked up, "What would that be dear?"

I placed my fork and knife down on the table in front of me and picked up my napkin. "Well," I spoke into the napkin as I gently wiped my mouth. "While Sean can be a nice guy I, personally, find him to be a little annoying and pushy. I don't see there ever being anything between us besides, maybe, friendship."

"Oh you don't mean that Janie," Lenore waved of what I said as if I was a silly child. "You should ask Sean out - go on a few dates - get to know him; you'll change your mind about him, I'm sure of it."

"I don't want to go out with him," I told her.

"Don't be silly," she slid her chair back from the table. "You should call him tonight, make plans to see him this weekend." Before I could tell her I wasn't going to call him, she jumped up and told me she had his number in her address book. "I'll be just a minute," she told us as she hurried out of the room.

I sat frozen in place as I stared at the empty space that she occupied only moments ago. I'm beginning to see what Amber was talking about all these years; Lenore is difficult! I didn't realize I said that out loud until I heard a chuckle. Slowly, I turned my head towards Carl, I forgot that he was still in the room. "I didn't mean any disrespect," I told him quickly, totally embarrassed.

"I know," he smiled at me. "Once Lenore gets an idea in her head, she doesn't know how to take no for an answer but she means well Janie."

"I guess she does but I'm not used to someone trying to..." I wanted to say 'control' my life but was that really fair? Yes, she wanted to be give Sean a call and go out with him but other than that, she was really nice to me.

"I'll tell you the same thing I used to tell Amber - humor her. It's easier to make Lenore understand that something isn't going to work, if you make an effort." He took a sip of his water. As he returned his glass to the table, he asked me if there was any reason I couldn't go out with Sean. "Are you seeing Devon again?"


The thing is, I wasn't. Devon and I didn't talk about getting back together at all. Sure, he was all touchy feely and romantic while I was staying with him but since I moved out, I barely see him. I know that it has a lot to do with our schedules and it was easier to make the time when we were tripping over each other at his place but I had hoped that it would continue. Although, he does call me every night, even when he's swamped at work, he's calling me to 'say hi'.

"Here it is!" Lenore called as she walked back into the room. "There you go dear," she handed me a sticky note with Sean's phone number on it. "I really think you should call him tonight Janie."

Since telling her that I wasn't sure that I would be anything more than friends with him didn't get her to back off, I tried it from a new angle. "I'm not sure Lenore, isn't it a little trampish for a young woman to 'chase' after a man like this? I mean, he does know where I live and I'm sure, if he was interested, he could easily get my number from Amber or you or even me for that matter. He hasn't because he's not interested in me."

"That's possible Janie," Lenore agreed. "Although, I think it was interesting that he was waiting for you Christmas Day."

I had nothing to say to that. I didn't understand why Sean was waiting for me that day and he didn't shed any light on the subject either.

I left their house that night having promised Lenore that I would call him before the weekend.

I didn't but I told her I did. Now she wants to know what was said, when we are going out and where we are going.

So I have two choices, tell her I lied or actually call him and ask him out.

I think I'm going to have to fess up to my lie because every time I reach for the phone to call Sean, I picture Devon.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Dinner With My "Parents"

After years of hearing Amber complain about her parents always butting into her business, I was expecting the worst when I moved into their guest house. Needless to say, I was surprised to find out that they were just as bad as they thought they were, only, I didn't mind. It was nice to have someone worry about me if I was late getting home. It was nice to have someone treat me like one of their own; my mom just let me do whatever I wanted.

Of course the part I didn't like was Lenore's unsolicited advice on my love life. "I'm only saying this because I don't want to see you get hurt again Janie," she said to me last night at dinner. "Devon is a nice boy, I've known him for years but dear, I worry that he'll only end up leaving you miserable. But," her face lit up. "Then there's Sean." Carl's head snapped up when Lenore mentioned Sean's name.

"Now Lenore, stay out of Janie's love life, she's better suited to figure out who she wants to be with." He smiled at me, "I think Devon is a good young man and Amber has mentioned that he's changed quite a bit in the last few months. Plus," he glanced at Lenore. "He was more respectable than Sean was at Amber's during Christmas."

"Oh what do you know?" Lenore waved him off with her hand.

Carl looked thoughtful as his fork hovered in front of his mouth. "Well," he said with a smirk. "I did arrange for Amber to meet Reed at his birthday party," he turned to me. "I always thought Reed's calmness would be a good match for Amber's flair for the dramatic. Of course," he shrugged slightly. "I didn't expect for Alexis to come along as early as she did; I didn't handle that well at all."

"Honestly Carl! Will you stop already? It's not like you had any role in them falling in love."

"Yes I did my Sweet. If I didn't make Amber go to that party, she wouldn't have met him and we wouldn't be having a wedding this year." Carl looked pretty pleased with himself. I can't really say that I blame him, Amber and Reed are a great couple, they seem to have everything going for them and they are perfectly fitted.

"Go on," Lenore scoffed. "You may have made her go to that party but I encouraged her to go out with him when he asked her out."

I smiled, it was nice to see parents arguing over who had a hand in their daughter's happiness as opposed to who ruined who's life. I didn't want to burst either of their bubbles and tell them that Amber only went out with Reed because she thought he was cute and he was older, which excited her. The fact that her parents approved of him, well, it wasn't a pro, if you know what I mean.

"Lenore," I smiled sweetly at her. "While I appreciate your concern and I value your opinion, I know what I feel," I pressed my hand against my chest. "In here."

Lenore perked up, "What would that be dear?"

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Fun Times

I had planned on telling you all about the rest of my Christmas a while ago but between the move into Amber's parents' guest house and the horrible head cold I managed to catch, I didn't have the time to post.

It's been over two weeks since Christmas Day, so instead of giving you the long boring version of every moment, I'll just hit on some of the high and low points of the day - well that's the plan, we'll see how well that goes.

At 10:30 Christmas morning, Devon and I pulled into his parents' drive. "Janie, I have to tell you something," he said as he turned off the engine and looked at me.

"What is it?" I asked as I glanced towards the house, surprised by how nervous I felt to be there with him.

"I didn't tell you before, I didn't want you to worry but I think I should let you know my grandparents will be joining us for dinner."

My eyes widen, I started to panic. Spending time with his parents, having them judge me was bad enough but his grandparents? "Why?" I whined, "Why didn't you tell me this before?"

"I didn't want you to freak," he sighed, "Please don't be mad."

"I'm not," I sat back in my seat. "I'm just....surprised."

He was watching me, I could feel his gaze on me. "Do you need a minute?" He asked softly.

"No," I shook my head. "Let's go." I made a move to open my door and he told me to hold on a minute as he jumped out of the car to run around to open my door for me. He held out his hand, I smiled as I slipped mine into his. "Why thank you kind sir," I joked as I stood before him.

He grinned as his eyes travelled down my body and back up again until he met my eyes. "Did I tell you that you look amazing in that outfit?"

I smiled; I was wearing the sweater and pants his parents gave me. "You mom has pretty good taste, don't you think?"

He shrugged, "Maybe it's not the clothes that makes the outfit look amazing."

"What do you mean, how can the clothes not make the outfit?"

"I mean," he leaned down, "You make that outfit amazing."

I laughed, "Why Devon are you flirting with me?"

He pouted, "I was trying too."

"Thank you," I kissed his cheek. "You look pretty amazing yourself," I slipped my hands over his chest, my fingers enjoying the softness of the cashmere sweater his parents gave him.

I guess we were lost in the moment, or just spending too much time outside on our own for just when I thought Devon was going to kiss me, we were interrupted by his mother. "Devon dear," she called from the front steps of the house. "You and Janie should come in from the cold before you both catch your death of cold!"

"Don't worry, I'll take care of you" Devon whispered against my ear before telling his mom we were coming.

Dinner with his family wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I thought that his grandparents would be stuck up snobs who would hate me on sight but they seemed to really like me. In fact, his grandmother told Devon that I seemed like a 'good' girl and he would be wise to take that into consideration. "I want to see you happy Devon and I believe Janie can make you happy, if you let her."

Devon's reply? "Grandma don't worry about me, I'm happy."

I tried to pretend that I didn't hear this conversation, I didn't want to think about us as a couple or even me without him. But still the thought of being with him, well to be honest, it made my heart skip a beat. I really wanted his hands all over my body. I wanted to taste his skin. I wanted...him. Badly.

After we left his parents place, we drove straight to Amber and Reed's house. "Did Amber invite the entire neighbourhood?" He asked when we pulled into the crowded driveway.

"She told me it was just family," I replied as he helped me out of the car once again.

Reed answered the door when we rang the door bell, "Hey Amber! Janie and Devon are here!"

"Oh good!" Amber called from the kitchen. "Tell her to come in here!"

"You heard her," Reed laughed as he closed the door behind us.

After removing our jackets, Devon was attacked by a little girl in a frilly red and black dress. "Hey there Lexi!" He scooped her up into his arms and she wrapped her tiny arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. "How's my girl?"

Alexis started to 'talk' to him and he was captivated; he didn't hear me when I told him I was going into the kitchen.

In the kitchen is where it seemed to be where all the women were hanging out. I walked in there and instantly was greeted by Amber, her mom, Reed's mom and grandmother, Kelly and Nadine. "What is she doing here?" I asked Amber when she came over to hug me.

"Who?" She looked over her shoulder. "Kelly?"

"Yeah," I nodded. "After everything with Devon..."

"Janie, I invited Kelly and Chris because they are my friends." She sighed. "Please don't make a big deal out of this, she's not interesting in Devon."

"But Devon -"

"Loves you," Amber finished for me.

"He's not coming in," Reed groaned as he wrapped his arms around Amber's waist. "He just standing out there, staring off into space. I don't know what to do."

I shot Amber a look but she was focused on Reed. "Honey I'm sure it's nothing, what did he say?"

"He said he was waiting for Sunshine, what the hell does that mean? It's night!"

"I don't know Reed but I'm sure he'll soon change his mind and joy you guys," she kissed him. "Now go," she pointed towards the living room. "I have things to do still."

Reed pouted, he turned to me, "Now that she's agreed to marry me, I've been demoted; food is more important than me!"

"Oh whatever!" Amber scoffed. "You weren't complaining last night or this morning or..." Reed grabbed her, kissing her words out of her mouth.

When he let her go, she gave a girly giggle as she stumbled backwards, reaching for the wall to steady herself. "So ummm," she played with her hair as she gazed up at him, "I'll see you later?"

He chuckled deeply, "Of course my darling." He quickly kissed her cheek before wandering into the living room.

"Ahh," Amber sighed happily. "He's so perfect Janie, I love him."

Amber soon snapped out of the love haze that surrounded her and assigned me a food prep task like she did with the rest of the women in the kitchen. I was cutting up the vegetables that Kelly was peeling when I had the weird feeling that someone was watching me. I glanced towards the living room but Devon was deep in conversation with Carl about something as he held Alexis on his lap. I was about to call myself crazy when I noticed Sean outside the door to the deck, he was watching me and when I looked at him, he motioned for me to come over.

I shook my head, he gave me a look and motioned again before walking away from the door. I glanced around to see if anyone noticed, Amber was looking at me. "What was that about?" She mouthed. When I shrugged, she came over to me, "Sunshine?" She questioned. "Are you what he was talking about?" I didn't reply which only made her more curious. "What's going on between you and Sean? Are you...?"

"Nothing's going on," I told her. "I don't know why he wants me to go out there."

"Well," Amber glanced over my shoulder at Devon in the living room. "Maybe you should find out why and make a decision."

"Amber it's not like I'm encouraging him! He's..." I shrugged, "I don't know, maybe he's bored."

There was a light tap on the kitchen window, it was Sean; Amber went over to see what he wanted. "Why don't you come in here?" She asked once she opened the window a little, "It's cold out there."

"I'll be in soon Amber," he smiled at her and before turning away, he glanced at me.

Amber came back over to me, "Would you go out there so he will come in?"

Despite not really wanting to go out there, I felt bad. Making sure that no one was paying too much attention, I made my way out to the deck where Sean was waiting. "What's gotten into you?" I asked. "Why are you being antisocial when your family is in there waiting to spend today with you?"

"They aren't my family Janie, I don't really know them."

"Not your family?" I felt insulted when he said that. "Well buddy aren't you just being a jerk today! How dare you stand out here and deny them? They've done everything in their power to get to know you and to make up for the time they've missed and..." I glared at him. "What the hell are you doing? You were the one who wanted to find them! This," I motioned towards the house, "Is what you wanted! Isn't it?"

"You don't understand Janie," he stared off into space. "I miss my real family."

"Your real family?" I shook my head. "And who do you think Lucinda, Roger and Reed are?"

"That's not -"

"Screw you Sean, you have not one but two families who love you and you are sitting out here feeling sorry for yourself?" I was so angry. "You make me sick," I snapped. "Try not having a family at all. Try being alone during the most family oriented season there is. Not your real family," I repeated. "You don't deserve to be apart of this family!"

Without giving him a chance to say anything, I stomped back into the house, slamming the door behind me. "Of all the inconsiderate selfish jerks..." I muttered as I rejoined the girls in the kitchen.

A few minutes later, Sean came in from outside but instead of going to the living room with the guys, he came into the kitchen and directly to me. "Listen Janie," he was standing close to me as he spoke in hushed tones. "I didn't mean it that way, I just meant that I was missing my other family."

"Amber was there something else you wanted me to do?" I asked, completely ignoring Sean.

"Yeah," Amber replied hesitantly. "Could you start on the salad?"

"Sure," I walked over to the fridge to grab the lettuce and then stood at the sink to wash it off.

He followed me. "Janie I didn't mean to upset you."

I turned to ask Amber something and I saw Devon watching us, he didn't look happy at all. I wanted to tell him it wasn't anything but he looked away and returned to the living room.

"Sean," Lucinda pulled him away from me and I couldn't have been more grateful for that.

An hour later, we were all seated around the dinner table enjoying the fabulous meal that Amber created. Reed was sitting at the head of the table with his mom to his right. Next to Lucinda was Roger, then Sean, Madeline, Chris, Kelly with Gabe and Carl at the other end of the table. To Carl's right was Lenore, then Nadine, Hal, me, Devon and Amber with Alexis. There seemed to be a lot of people when we were all sitting down, I made a comment about that and from the other end of the table Chris and Kelly laughed.

"What's so funny?" Devon asked as I passed him the potatoes.

"Oh well, I guess we can tell everyone," Kelly glanced at Chris, taking his hand in hers as she beamed. "It looks like the table will be a little more crowded next year," she placed one tentative hand on her belly and smiled. "We are having a baby!"

Nadine squealed which seemed to start the frenzy of questions and congratulations. I turned to see how the news effected Devon and was surprised to see him smiling. "You're happy?"

"About the baby?" He shrugged, "I'm happy that she is happy, she was pretty miserable when we were..."


He nodded, "Yeah, she wasn't happy so this is good."

I wanted to say something else but I wasn't sure what would be the right thing to say to the man who's ex-fiancee just announced that she was pregnant.

Conversation turned to babies, taking care of them and the fun of child birth, I tuned it out as I focused on my dinner.

Just after Amber served dessert, Sean kicked me under the table. "Hey," I glared at him.

"How you doing?" He leaned in over the table. "I have to say you are looking better than the last time I saw you."

"Well the last time was the night of the fire Sean."

"Yeah thanks for bringing that up," Devon slipped his arm around the back of my chair. "Real smooth."

Sean ignored him and continued with what he was saying. "You look less like 'Spitfire' tonight, definitely 'Sunshine' material. You look beautiful tonight Janie." Across the table, I heard Amber gasp and saw Reed's fork pause in mid air.

"What?" Devon looked back and forth between the two of us. "What is that about?" He asked me and then asked Sean what the hell his problem was.

Sean raised a brow, "You don't agree Devon?"

All conversation stopped, everyone was looking down at our end of the table.

"Whether I agree or not isn't the point -"

"Oh?" Sean scoffed. "Then what do you think the point is?"

"I don't know what you are use to Sean but around here the only woman who should be complimented publicly at the dinner table is the woman responsible for the fantastic meal we were all enjoying," he turned to his right where Amber was feeding Alexis dessert as she sat on Reed's knee. "Amber, you truly out did yourself tonight. Not only is the food delicious but you made it all seem so effortless," he smiled. "Keep this up and we'll all keep coming back!"

A couple of people added their compliments as Amber blushed deeply. "Thank you everyone," she grinned, "I'm glad you could all be here with us tonight."

Devon sat back in his chair, a smirk on his face.

Sean glared at him.

Me? I thought Devon was right, Amber was the one who threw all this together, she deserved to be complimented at her own table, not me. But still, it would've been nice to hear Devon say I looked good in front of everyone.

It was a little uncomfortable from that point on, what with Sean and Devon both glaring at each other throughout the rest of the evening. I was really happy when it came time for us to leave.

Devon was pretty quiet on the drive home, I knew he was still stewing over what Sean said and I tried to get him to talk but he asked me to just drop it for now. When we walked into his place, he said he was going to take a shower as he disappeared into his room.

A half hour later, I was flipping through the channels on his satellite when he came out of his room and joined me on the couch. "What are you doing down at that end?" I stretched out my arms. "Come here."

"Janie, I-"

"Oh ok," I chuckled, "I'll come to you!" I started to crawl down the couch towards him. "Why are you Mr Grumpypants tonight?"

"Janie about earlier - oh," he sighed as I curled up next to him. "I can't think when you do that sweetheart."

"Oh?" I smiled innocently as I stroked his chest.

"Mmhmm," he wrapped his arms around me, his chin resting against my temple. "I'm sorry about tonight Janie."

"Oh don't be sorry Devon, what you said was right, Amber did deserve credit for the dinner tonight."

"I didn't mean that Janie. I meant -"

"Thank you for not making a big deal out of what Sean was saying."

"Argh!" He rubbed his hand over his face. "I wanted to punch his lights out - calling me out like that - who the hello does he think he is?"

I tried hard not to smile, "So it did bug you, that he complimented me?"

"Oh yeah," he admitted. "It's never easy to see another man hitting on your..." I looked up at him as he trailed off.

Normally I would've questioned him about what he was going to say but this time I just let it go, I didn't need to hear him say I was his girl, I knew that he was thinking it. I hugged him tight, "I'm glad we got to spend today together, it was a lot of fun."

We stayed on the couch until the early morning hours. It was the best way to end the perfect day.

Since that day we seem to be getting closer. We are still on the 'friends' side of the relationship line but you should see the look he gets when he thinks I'm not watching - it's so hot - I almost jumped his bones numerous times. I guess it's a good thing that I moved into the guest house; I can keep my panties on and...well, maybe that's not such a great idea cause I can't stop thinking about him in my bed.