It seems like time has flown by since the night I went over to Devon's. I went over there with the intention of finding something, or doing something to make him come home.
As you all know, I didn't find him, instead I spotted his laptop and decided to email him. I poured my heart out into an email that I really didn't think I would be around to see him read - let alone spill to him the moment I saw him wrapped up in another chick.
OK, to be honest, he wasn't wrapped up in her, he actually looked a little bored with her. Or maybe that's what I wanted to see. Who really knows?
All I know is that I was the one he didn't want to leave that night. I was the one he was spending time with. I was the woman who's hand was in his. I was the women he wanted be to with.
And, since I'm being honest, despite the troubles in our past and the uncertainty of our future, I wanted to be with him. Call me crazy, but I don't care. I meant what I said in the email to him.
"Janie?" Devon crouched down until he was eye to eye with me. He chuckled nervously, something I barely ever heard him do.
He didn't push me. After the initial 'can I go with you?' Devon didn't ask or beg or anything - he waited. Waited for me to utter something to give him hope.
"Devon...." I let out the breath I was apparently holding. It was a big moment for me, to admit that I wanted someone by my side, I wanted to say the right thing. I wanted it to be perfect. Well, as perfect as possible.
The front door opened and the blonde poked her head out. "Devon are you coming in?"
I yanked my hand back and turned away from them. I wanted to walk away but I just couldn't do it, I didn't want anything to happen between them. I didn't want her to think that if I left it meant she had a free pass with my man.
That's right, I said it 'my' man.
And as soon as the little skank was out of the way, I planned on telling him. "I think it's time to go home," I said over my shoulder.
"No!" Devon exclaimed as I felt him move in behind me. "Janie we need -"
Looking over my shoulder, I stared past him, to her. "It's time for you to go home."
She started to sputter, asking me who I thought I was.
I resisted the urge to turn around and rise to the bait. I didn't need to explain anything to her.
As I stood with my back to them, I heard Devon tell her that I was right, it was time for her to go home.
"Are you sure?" She asked him.
"Yes," he replied.
"Ok." She walked by me but before she disappeared out of sight, she turned. "Tell her the truth Devon. I'll talk to you later."