Too Close For Comfort

"That's why I think you should give me the land," my dad said smugly over his glass of wine.

"Excuse me?" I stared at him blankly. "You think I should give you the land that my mom left me, the land that had been in her family for generations, because you feel you deserve it after being married to her?"

Dad scoffed, "It's not like you can afford to rebuild on the land Janie. The taxes alone are more than you can afford. I'm only thinking of you dear."

Yeah, right! I shook my head in disbelief. "Is that all you wanted?" I asked, he had been calling Devon's place since the night of the fire and calling Devon at work everyday to set up this meeting. "You don't want to know how I'm doing? If I'm having nightmares? Or if I'm even missing mom?"

"Janie come on! Of course you are having nightmares! That woman was horrible!"

"Hey!" I jumped up, not caring that my actions drew the attention of those seated in the restaurant around me. "I loved mom and I miss her everyday dad. I'm not going to just give you the only thing left from the time I spent with her and I don't appreciate the way you belittle her, even now, after she's dead." I grabbed my purse and crutches, "I have to go."

It didn't take much for him to catch up with me, I was, after all, trying to maneuver through a bust restaurant on crutches. "Listen Janie -"

"No dad, you listen. That land is all I have left from mom, I may not be able to live on it right now but I plan on doing so in the future."

"Be reasonable Janie, you can't afford it."

"You're right," I admitted. "I don't have a lot of money to throw around like you do but I'll be damned if I just give my mother's family land over to the man who screwed around with her heart long after the divorce was final." He tried to tell me that I didn't know what I was talking about but I didn't want to hear it, I found out lots of stuff since the fire that I didn't know. "I know that neighbours talk dad, I know about the visits you made to the house while I was out, I know about the booze you brought mom." My dad paled and I wanted to punch his lights out. "I know all about the promises you made to her dad, all the lies you told her about coming home and being a family again."

"Janie..."

"No," I snapped. "I don't want to hear it," I told him. As I turned to left, I threw one last comment over my shoulder, "As far as I'm concerned, you killed my mom."

When I got back to Devon's last night, I wanted to head straight for his bathroom, fill his huge tub with bubbles and hideaway for the rest of the night but he was waiting by the door when I let myself in.

"Your dad called me," he helped me with my coat. "He told me that you were upset and he just wanted to make sure you got back here ok."

"Sure he did," I rolled my eyes.

Devon watched me cross the floor to his couch to sit down. "Did you at least finish your meal before you got upset and stormed out?" I glared at him. "I'm just asking because I ordered some Chinese take out," he told me with a smile. "I called them just after I hung up with your dad, I figured you would be hungry still."

He joined me on the couch, "Did you want to talk about what happened?"

I shook my head and then started to spill everything that happened. By the time I was done, he was holding me and I was crying, a situation that has happened a lot since the fire. "God, I hope this doesn't become a pattern for us," I said jokingly when I could speak without sobbing again.

"I kind of like this," he murmured.

"You do?" I glanced up at him.

"Mmhmm," he smiled, "I don't like the reason this is happening but I like being the one to comfort you instead of being the one to piss you off." He pressed his lips against my forehead and sighed contently. "Despite all the energy you put into pushing me away Janie, I don't believe that your feelings for me have changed." He pulled back enough to gaze into my eyes. "I know my feelings for you haven't changed."

"Devon -"

He cut me off with a kiss. "Don't," he pleaded softly. "Don't think, just let this moment happen."

The moment he was talking about just involved me being all wrapped up in his arms, I didn't have the energy to fight him so I didn't.

This morning as I pretended to be asleep while he got ready for work, I realized that I couldn't stay here any longer without losing myself in him again. It's time I found another place to stay.

Telling him that will be the hardest part, he seems to like having me around.